Today was eventful in a good way. Isaac is no longer on epinephrine! His lactate level is 4.7, which is still high (normal is less than 2), but Danny's lactate level was never lower than 7. That is one of several things that show that Isaac is different than Danny. Even if he has the same thing, he's much less severely affected.
I had my emotional breakdown this morning. We all knew it would come, and it did. I'm sure that it won't be the last one either, but the first is usually the worst. However, I was rescued from my pity-party by my husband and a old friend from the Little Light House - both of whom God used to speak peace to my heart and to calm my fears and ease my frustrations. God gave them both the ability to see though my foolish concerns and speak wisdom to me. In spite of it all, God is good, and He continues to bless us in the circumstances that we are in.
I don't understand His purpose in all of this, but I'm going to choose to trust Him anyway. Danny taught us that God is sovereign and faithful and true. Each of our other boys has lessons for us. I'm sure Isaac is going to teach us plenty.
edited to add: I am realizing that I need to tell you all that the perceived infection (if it existed) is probably going away with the broad-spectrum antibiotic that Isaac's on and the prayers. The cultures aren't growing anything. And he's peeing much better, though he is still puffy. He has a way to go in that area.