For the want of an idea

I'm mentally stir-crazy. I think #2 is, too.

We've spent nine months gearing up to meet #4, and now that we have, there is nothing to look forward to. I spent nine months planning, and now as my careful plans are put into action - I have nothing to plan. I have school planned for next year. I hope to figure out how to link my kindergartener's trip around the world into the sidebar of this blog because I'd love to share it freely, but I don't know if I can share it that way because it borrows heavily from Galloping the Globe and Sonlight Core C.

I need something to think about beside what chore to accomplish next and what to cook for dinner tomorrow. #2 needs something to think about besides who is coming over or where are we going the day after tomorrow or what video to watch.

Basically, I'm physically exhausted and mentally bored. I need something good to read, but nothing seems to suit my fancy at the moment. Something to plan or think on to write about would be good, but I really don't need anything else to do with deadlines. And yet, if I had a reading assignment and a deadline, I might try to meet it. When I have nothing to focus on in my thoughts, it's a lot easier to slip into self-pity or outright depression - and since I'm postpartum and sleep-deprived, those are things to guard against.

I don't know what to do with myself. I'm gathering a unit study on Curious George (see previous entry) to try to occupy #2 for a few days at least. I want to get back into the swing of doing schoolwork during the morning naptime - just have to get everything organized.

But right now, I need to wake my napping husband, clean some bathrooms, and then send man and some boys to buy lightbulbs - which I had in the cart on Thursday when I went to the store, but they didn't make it home. But first, #3 needs some attention.